Chunk-n-Chip: Manna From Heaven!!!!!

I'm starting to pick up a little bit of momentum and confidence when it comes to food trucks!!! I've been visiting many of them for some months now, but have only just been getting small samples of what they have to offer and haven't had many serious meals from them!!!! However, not long ago I came across the Chunk-n-Chip ice-cream sandwich truck, by accident believe it or not, at a food truck gathering here in Orange County and almost instantaneously fell in love!!!!! Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!
Chunk-n-Chip specializes in homemade ice-cream sandwiches and hands down they are some of the sweetest, most delectable, flavorful creations of baked sweet sugary goodness that exists in this fair country of ours!!!!!! This truck reminds me of Diddy Riese in Westwood, and though Diddy Riese is amazing and I would absolutely never ever ever ever ever disparage those fine desert concoctions that the UCLA student body and faculty frequents and is no doubt a Los Angeles institution, Chunk-n-Chip I would say is a bit more creative and edgy with their ice-cream sandwiches!!!! Chunk-n-Chip has many distinct cookie creations as well as unique ice-cream flavors and when you put the two of them together, forget it!!!!! Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!! Has anybody seen that movie Stripes with Bill Murray and Harold Ramis?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! "Lee Harvey.... You are a madman!!!!.... That time that you made it with the cow?!?!?! The two of us together, forget it!!!!!" Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!
Anyway, the other day with my belly filled with the salty, fatty, greasy bar food goodness that one sucks down while tipping multiple pints of Samuel Adams Summer Ale on a hot muggy summer afternoon, I began craving something savory and sweet!!!!! With the knowledge via Twitter that Chunk-n-Chip would be down in the Orange County area from Los Angeles, I just couldn't pass this opportunity up to have one of their sando's!!!!! I mean, I couldn't pass the opportunity up to have Chunk-n-Chip anymore than Rahcel Uechetel could pass up on the opportunity of wrecking Tiger Woods' marriage and then extorting many millions of dollars out of him to stay silent and not reveal any of the juicy details of their love affair!!!!!! How'd that one work out for you, Tiger?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!! I know I know... Home wreckers are bad!!!!!
The Chunk-n-Chip ice cream truck I saw was going to be at Beckman High School in Irvine, and though I had to drive a little ways, it wasn't too far for me to make my way down there!!! The day I was at Beckman HS getting ready to pulverize Chunk-n-Chip sandwiches like Mike Tyson did to Robin Givens, it was hot and humid and drops of sweat were sliding to the edge of my nose and dripping to the ground with each step I took!!! My shirt was soaked with moisture and it felt like I was riding on a riverboat casino across the Delta in Tunica, Mississippi!!!!! I mean, damn it was hot and muggy!!!! And to shove down multiple freezing cold ice-cream sandwiches to bring my core temperature to a reasonable level sounded magnificent and refreshing!!!!!!!! Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!
So, when I walked up to the Chunk-n-Chip truck I ordered a chocolate chip cookie sandwich with rocky road ice-cream, as well as a chocolate brownie cookie sandwich with a white chocolate ice-cream in the middle!!!! At Chunk-n-Chip, they refer to their sandwiches as "Boo-Yah's!" At first I though it was kind of funny that Chunk-n-Chip names their dessert products after a tacky hip-hop saying from the early 90's... but whatever! To each their own!!! After trying a "Boo-Yah" I'm kind of used to the name and have warmed up to the notion of calling Chunk-n-Chip sandwiches "Boo-Yah's!" Ahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! Mad love Chunk-n-Chip!!! First off, the chocolate chip cookie sandwich! The cookies were absolutely divine!!! Like, it was manna from heaven that Moses had called down from above after leading the Israelites through the wilderness when they were starving and out of food!!!! These cookies were so warm and gooey, and with that rocky road, it made for one of the most delicious ice-cream sandwiches, ever!!!!!!!! No lie!!!!!!! There were chocolate stains all over my face and hands from the warm melted chocolate chips, and constantly I had to lick my fingers and wipe my face with each bite I took!!!!!!!! It was amazing!!!!!! Next I moved on to the brownie cookie with white chocolate ice-cream!!!! Again, this cookie was simply stunning to taste when it entered my mouth!!! It was so sweet and delicious and combined with a certain chunkiness of the white chocolate ice-cream I would've been open to kneeling down to and offering human sacrifices to the Chunk-n-Chip truck had I not known any better or if this world we live in were completely uncivilized, free from Spanish Catholic influence!!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!
Afterwards, when my Chunk-n-Chip sando's were completely consumed, my sweet tooth was satisfied to the fullest extent possible!!!!! Also, when I payed for my sandwiches, the lovely young lady taking orders asked me for my phone number, but I think it was because she needed it for my credit card transaction!!!! Either way, it made me feel like a stud, and made my trip to Chunk-n-Chip even more memorable!!!!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!

Anytime you see the Chunk-n-Chip truck, you owe it to yourself to get over to them and pound their lovely dessert sando's to no end!!!!!! Do it!!!!!! You will be filled with the presence of God!!!!!!! I love you Chunk-n-Chip!!!!!! Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!

Grill Em All: Obey Your Master!!!!!!

So I guess I'm a Johnny Come Lately when it comes to the whole food truck scene!!!! Every time I think of a food truck, my mind immediately goes to a bunch of gardeners laying on a freshly cut lawn of green grass they have just finished working on while a roach coach is pulled up along side of them pushing cheaply prepared sandwiches and God knows what else for their lunch breaks!! Hey, God bless those who keep our parks and lawns tidy and neat!!! They deserve a break after working hard all day out in the hot sun!!!!! However, I've never been compelled to spend my money or waste a meal on food that comes from a food truck!!! Call me a snob or whatever, but it just doesn't sound too appetizing to me!!!! But with the rise of the food truck scene and with myriad food trucks lavishing their fusion gourmet cuisine onto the Southern California eating scene, I decided it was time I get with the times and try some of them out!!!!!! Hey, the Church over time has gotten with it by now ordaining women, looking the other way at pre-marital sex, and now marrying homosexual couples!!!!! If the church can get with it when it comes to certain social issues, well then, I can get with it when it comes to expanding my horizons when it comes to eating at a g-damn food truck for lunch!!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! Look, I'm aware those above statements about the Church will be deemed offensive to some, so just pull the wadded cotton panties out from your crack and know that I'm just trying to have fun!!!!!! Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!

Anyway, one of the contributing factors that led me to the realization that food trucks are actually puting out some pretty dignified cuisine has to do with the Food Network show called The Great Food Truck Race!!! To be honest, I think reality TV is obnoxious and substandard programming at best and I've always thought Americans' love of reality TV was a sad commentary on our intellectual and moral reputation to the rest of the civilized and uncivilized world!!!! Reality TV is idiotic in my opinion!!! However, being that a lot of the food truck contestants on The Great Food Truck Race were from Orange County and being that the food they were serving would look nothing short of salivating, into the The Great Food Truck Race did I get sucked, much like Paris Hilton's boyfriend did in that bootlegged home video of the two of them after a long night of boozing at the Hollywood clubs!!!! Did I just cross the line there?!?!?!?!?!?! Yeah, maybe I did!!! I apologize to my under 18 demographic!!!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!! OK OK, I'll clean it up!!!!

OK! So, I didn't watch season 1 of the The Great Food Truck Race, but I had heard that the Grill Em All Truck was the victor of this inaugural food truck competition and that they in fact set up shop in multiple locations all around the Southern California area!!!! After following them on Twitter for a little while, I waited until they were going to be somewhat close to me and then, BAM!!!! The Grill Em All Truck and my empty stomach and hearty appetite were going to clash much like Megadeth, Slayer, and Suicidal Tendencies clashed while on that one tour in the fall of 1990!!!!!!!!! Just to give you a little bit of context leading up to my visit to Grill Em All, I had been drinking heavily the night before!!! Like really heavily!!!!! I like to drink beer and imbibe in a few glasses of wine a couple of times a week, but that's about the extent of it!!!! But on this particular night, I think I had more to drink then I ever had in my entire life!!!!!!! Not on the night I turned 21, not during my bachelor party, nor the time I went on a bender in Vegas with some friends from college, had I ever had more to drink than on the night before I ate at Grill Em All!!!! No no no no no no!!!! This night conquered all of them!!!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!! The drink of choice for us all was something called an Oatmeal Cookie!!! OK, I don't particularly care for hard liquor or cocktails and I'm not even that familiar with the many different cocktails that exist, but Oatmeal Cookies.... Shesus!!!!!!! I mean with each shot I took it was like the Pepperidge Farm baker was there giving us sample after sample after sample after sample after sample after sample of that warm gooey baked sugary cookie batter benevolence!!!!! The only problem was was that there was an s-load of alcohol in each shot!!!! Holy God!!!!!!! Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! Needless to say, when I woke up on my living room floor the next morning with my face down on the hardwood tile, I had a splitting headache, was completely disoriented, and was still a little inebriated from the alcohol leftover in my system from the night before!!!!!!! When I pushed myself up off the floor, and after emptying half of the five gallon Arrowhead water container in the kitchen and gulping down a pot and a half of coffee, I slowly started coming to my senses and began tofeel the booze wearing off!!!!! Whoooooooaaaaaaaa!!!!!

Being that my post drinking hunger was occuring that morning, as opposed to the night before, and after pushing myself up off the floor, I somehow remembered Grill Em All wasn't gonna be that far away from me that afternoon!! So, I grabbed my wallet and off I went to see Grill Em All at a local park!!!!!

When I got there, they weren't quite open yet, but a substantial line had been forming with eaters waiting expectantly for the Grill Em All burgers made famous through not only their taste, but through their victory on The Great Food Truck Race!!!! Being that they weren't open, I had some time to look over the menu, strategize if you will, and figure out how I was going to best use up every last square inch of real estate in my devoid, alochol diluted stomach!!!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!

One of the things I noticed is that food trucks, most all the gourmet food trucks that is, are kind of pricy!!!!! I mean, make a trip to the damn Wells Fargo ATM or take out a small loan before you visit one of these mobile food vendors because it's expensive!!!! But after looking at the menu, it was as if I was just walking back from the bars and anything greasy, salty, cheesy, or fatty sounded absolutely delicious and divine!!!!!!! I mean, grilled gourmet burgers?!?!?!?!?! I couldn't have picked a better time to visit the Grill Em All truck!!!!!!! Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! Eventually, I decided on the Witte (wit-e) which had cream cheese, deep fried bacon, beer sauteed onion, and a vinegar aioli!!!! This burger... was awesome!!!! There is something about cream cheese on burgers that is absolutely genious and simply put, works!!! I mean, it works like taking your kids cell phone away from them works when they talk back to you so as to teach them a lesson to never speak to their parents in a disrespectful way again!!!!! This was a beautiful hangover recovery burger!!!!! But, being that I was still walking back from the bars so to speak, I wasn't done!!!!!!! Next, I went for the Behemoth!!!!! This was I believe the largest and most expensive burger on their menu!!!!! The Behemoth consisted of grilled cheese sandwhiches that served as buns, cheddar cheese, bacon, beer soaked onions, pickles and bbq sauce!!!!!! When I first saw the Behemoth my first thought was, "this is so unnecessary and so over the top... But it's so ingenious!!!!!!!!!!!!" On both the Witte and Behemoth, the beef, bacon and beer soaked onions were absolutely extraordinary!!!!!! I mean, as I sat on my park bench eating my burgers, I kept saying to myself, "I can't tell if this is truth or dream!!! Am I actually experiencing this or is this a fantasy? Because if it's a dream, I never want to go back to reality!!!! Hold my breath as I wish for death!!! Please God wake me!!!!" Ahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! I mean, I could've just died in that moment and woken up at the gates of Heaven knowing full well that when I had exited light after sampling some of the finest fatty hangover prevention food in all of Los Angeles, I had lived life to the fullest with these burgers sitting in my gut!!!!!!  These are absolutely brilliant burgers and it is not a surprise at all that they were the winners and champions of The Great Food Truck Race!!!!!! My advice to you, follow these guys on Twitter and whenever they are even remotely in your area, get your ass over to their master mobile eatery and take it to the face!!!!!!!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! Grill Em All rocks, and even though I'm not a heavy metal guy, these burgers are worth whatever price you pay or drive you make!!!!! Do this place and eat hard!!!!!!! Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!